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From the Inside Flap

This is the story of Susan--a wife, mother, Christian believer, lover of children, writer of stories, and woman of extraordinary intellect. Susan was diagnosed with a brain tumor in her late thirties. Although it was successfully treated, the process led to her slow, unending decline. In this powerful narrative, Victor Lee Austin weaves together autobiographical details and profound theological insights to show that we are called to turn to God in the face of suffering."Losing Susan is a theo-memoir of intricate beauty. In eloquent prose, Victor Austin testifies to the way in which God surprisingly gave him the desire of his heart through his wife, Susan, and then just as surprisingly took her away. Austin does not shy away from the rough edges and unanswered questions, but instead he brings them before God, narrating a love story not only about Victor and Susan but about God and his people in a world charged with both splendor and decay."--J. Todd Billings, Western Theological Seminary; author of Rejoicing in Lament: Wrestling with Incurable Cancer and Life in Christ"Father Austin has written a beautiful story of love, loss, and faith, a story that at once moves the mind to reflection, the heart to sympathy, and the will to trust. It is deep but accessible and handles pain and suffering, common to us all, with uncommon intelligence, sensitivity, and humor. This book will help those who have suffered similarly and will inspire and prepare those who have not, yet. It is above all a story of true love, the love between Victor and his dear late wife, their love for God, and God's love for them."--Stephen Hildebrand, Franciscan University of Steubenville

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From the Back Cover

In this personal story of love and loss, seasoned pastor-theologian Victor Lee Austin shares how caring for his wife during her long struggle with brain cancer and its aftereffects brought him face-to-face with his God and with his faith in unsettling ways."In this painfully truthful book, Victor Lee Austin draws on the theological wisdom shaped by suffering and death to tell us the story of Susan's, his wife's, determination to live and love though suffering from a terminal disease of the brain. As her caregiver, he refuses to hide from himself or us how hard caring for her had been. When finished with the book, however, the reader cannot help but think: what a wonderful love story. Thank God."--Stanley Hauerwas, Duke Divinity School; author of Hannah's Child: A Theologian's Memoir"An amazing book. Victor Austin has written a late-modern memoir, with the biblical God as a participant!"--Robert W. Jenson, former senior scholar for research, Center of Theological Inquiry"Victor Lee Austin breaks your heart without sentimentality, stretches your faith without clumsiness, brings you face-to-face with God without fear. By the end, you will know what it means to be precious, honored, and loved--by another and by God."--Samuel Wells, vicar, St. Martin-in-the-Fields, Trafalgar Square"This is a moving work, carefully crafted and thoughtfully honest. With lots of love and plenty of pain throughout, these pages bring to mind others who have written similarly, such as C. S. Lewis; however, Victor Austin's account of his and his family's experience in connection with his wife Susan's illness and death remains unique. I wish I had personally known Susan, and I am grateful to know Austin--and for his gift in writing."--Tobias Winright, Albert Gnaegi Center for Health Care Ethics, Saint Louis University

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Product details

Paperback: 160 pages

Publisher: Brazos Press; Reprint edition (February 28, 2017)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 1587434075

ISBN-13: 978-1587434075

Product Dimensions:

5.5 x 0.4 x 8.5 inches

Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.8 out of 5 stars

22 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#1,559,932 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Father Austin's interior work is a most difficult story - - that a man married to a woman he loves deeply who is dying. It is easy to avoid a book such as this: the topic is off putting; it is sad nearly from the first page; the tension in the when is unbearable, as we know there is no happy ending; and, may I say it, for the sophisticate, for the modern; and for the "educated:" city dweller, well, who is really going to take the writing of an Episcopal Priest, a theologian no less, seriously. ? Too easy to pass up; and in doing so, too easy to miss a life changing walk with this man in the realm of live, death and suffering. It is a few pages, but not a page turner. It stops you in your tracks. Do not miss this important, near great work.

Having lost my wife to brain cancer two years ago, I was hungry for a perspective on the age-old question of why bad things happen to good people and vice-versa. Knowing this was written by a pastor, I expected a somewhat preachy self-righteous book. Far from it, his experience seems to cause him to step back from his chosen profession and view it as a layman, to question his own faith at times, just as I guess we all do. He brings biblical references to us in an educational, rather than preachy way. I think many of us who don't wear our religion on our sleeves, are not known as "Bible Thumpers" are not extremely active in a church, etc, and while generally believing in God, but retaining just a hint of agnosticism, really appreciate his honest way of coming to terms with his loss. So much of what he experienced, I experienced... In the end, while I can say his faith is undoubtedly stronger than mine, this book was and is a very comforting read.

I am going to be honest. This book made me cry more often than not. I think it is because of the honesty in which Fr. Austin talked about his experiences with Susan. This easily has to be one of the best books I have ever read. From a Pastoral Care perspective, it provides the reader a perspective of understanding the questions of why God does what he does to those we love. He provides a unique view of God's love and the pain of losing a loved one. God's love can not be explained. God loves us and we love our spouses. However, God will ask for our Love back and at that point, we must accept that he will take back what He loves. Death is not an end but often times a release and a joy because it restores the equal nature the spouses have for one another.Fr. Austin after explaining his time with Susan discusses Jesus at the crucifixion. He describes it as a loud event with screams much how our life is constantly bombarded with things that need our attention. At the end, when Jesus had everything against him he still prays to God "Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?" (Matthew 27:46) Fr. Austin says that when God takes back our love there is finally silence. A calm peaceful feeling. He gives us the ability to be equal again. No matter how dark and bad it gets, Jesus has been further and therefore is with us. Although this prayer is in a question it shows that despite being at the darkest place without God, Jesus still prayed to God.I have found this book an important book for those looking into Pastoral Care and for those that are currently in it. The reason I believe this is because it comes from the point of view of the caregiver and survivor. It is a raw look into the emotions and trial of faith for the vow "For Sickness and In Health". It reminds us that it is the simple things that we love. That even in the worst of it there is still meaning in the prayers we say from the time we are children till now. In the midst of our theological teaching sometimes the survivor does n0t need to know the theological answer but needs hear the basic simple words of our youth. Jesus loves you and is with you although your paths diverge from one another, at the end your love and you will be reunited for greater things to come.

Not a book useful in finding gentle emotional poultices for the heart, or breathtakingly brilliant and mind-settling arguments for the intellect. It was, rather a personal, but thoroughly authentic (for those who have been fellow travelers with Father Austin) and raw recounting of the experience of the profound pain of living while deeply aware of the goodness of others, and their nature as gift - but a gift from a very strange God.Reading it was like praying, cursing, regretting, wrestling, but most of all giving thanks for God's always inexplicable, and sometimes unrecognized gifts.JMT

I'm in the midst of losing my wife of 25 years to breast cancer that has spread throughout her body including her brain. She has had cancer now for 17 years. Thank you for taking your time and putting your heart through all the love, pain and loss again by writing this book. It has helped me and should help others in similar situations.

I read this together with my wife over the last couple of weeks. We smiled, and shed many tears as we read the book. You'll find great theological meditations, laments, and life lessons within. It's wonderfully written, too.

Well written. Author was willing to share the intimate details of a very hard 20 years yet he never stopped loving or caring for her. Thank you Victor! CJM

Rev. Austin is a sensitive, gifted writer, and in this book, one finds his writing at its best.

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